Life in general

Oh how time seems to fly, I don't sit down to write on this near enough.  It seems like there are always ads to do or babies to tend to:)  My babies are growing so fast I know that making this a priority is more important than many of the things on my to do list.

Christmas was a haze with the sale and all that went on, it seems like it was hear and then it was gone.  My mom and dad came down for the sale, it was so good to see them and so hard to let them go back home.  Each day I come more and more to the realization of what a blessing each day is.  I hope that I cherish them a little more, it seems like all to often I let things that really don't matter take precedence over the things that really do.

Dad has had quite a bit of trouble with his heart.  They just put a pacemaker in about a month and a half ago.  He has started to give away many of his "earthly acquisitions" and in a way it breaks my heart to know he is thinking of the days when he won't be here.  For Christmas he gave us all a Navajo rug.  Each genuine rug has a flaw in it that the old women would leave to let any evil spirits out.  We used to spend hours on the floor in his office looking for the flaw, they were one of his most cherished possessions in this world.  Now as his children they will be one of ours.  It makes me cry quite easily knowing that someday I won't have him.  How lucky I have been to have the great legacy that I do.  I often contemplate that my children won't grow up with the desert, Asay Creek, or the barn meadows that I grew up roaming and loving.  I did have an enchanted childhood, with parents that I knew loved me.  Dad took us everywhere.  My memories are filled with long days in the saddle, bucket rides in the tractor and water sceeters in the barn ditch.  I would give about anything to let my children have those memories.

We have been down to Poteau quite a bit, I know it probably won't happen but someday I would love to buy it just so my children can have a piece of land to grow roots down into, a place to love where serenity can be found in the day to day chores of life.

Maggie is growing each day, she is her own little spirit that has more spunk and will power than most adults.  Her middle name should have been Gilbert, she reminds me so much of him.  She tells me her skin get's pinkley when she has been in the tub.  All she wanted for Christmas was a swing set and a yoyo, the yoyo came thanks to Peppa Pig which she LOVES.  She would very much enjoy if she could watch toons all day everyday which I do try to limit how much time she gets in front of the TV.  She LOVES her cats and talks to them like they are her little babies.  When she gets a bottle she refuses to drink it and unless it's "all the way to the top."  She would love to mother Garrett all day everyday and loves to play with her babies.  Lately she has started to play pretend on most everything.  Her "friends" consist of the shaving cream bottles (one night after John had got done shaving she wanted one of them in the tub, she informed me the leftover shaving cream was a booger) the baby wash and the soap dispensers.  Sometimes they go to bed with us, multiples of them, but for real:)  She loves honey bears which I have tried to eliminate in the last little while just so they don't leak everywhere.

Garrett is my kind soul who loves life and smiles at everything and everyone.  He is CRAZY lately in the fact he has no fear of heights and is on everything and falls off of everything.  I cannot keep him down from anything, of there is a way to climb it he does.  He is all boy, he growls at you, and is pretty easy to get a giggle.  I would love to get him weaned and yet it seems like his happy thoughts are nursing so we still nurse away.  He bites like the dickens and we have went the rounds a few times over it all.  He has suddenly grown a fettish for pulling Maggie's hair.  Last night he pulled it so hard he pulled her backwards in her chair she was sitting in.  It breaks his heart when you get mad at him and he has the saddest little cry in the world.  He has a little sweet tooth and would prefer you feed him candy, who wouldn't:)

John, my sweetheart, best friend, and love is as always crazy busy with trying to conquer the world.  He is never content to be idle and slow down and always takes on a bigger challenge somewhere, hence Poteau.  He really is my better half, we have had a heck of a ride, I don't know where I would be without him.  I love him with all my heart and soul.  We just had four years, there has been a lot of water under the bridge since then, a lot!!  He runs his head off for us and always has a smile, I marvel at his patience and his ability to stay calm in the eye of the storm.

My little Birdy is going to have a baby, I know how crazy is that!!!  I am so excited, how did she grow up so fast, where did childhood take us all and how is life so fleeting?  She has been terribly sick.  Tawnya and Rodney are coming home, it will be good for them to be back with dad, I will be glad to have them there just for the peace of mind.  Emily I pray with all my heart finds the happiness she deserves.  Jess is doing awesome on her mission, I need to write her.  I miss my Hells like crazy, I would give anything to have all my sisters live right next door.  Julie amazes me to stay on top of things, she is selling vitamins and gives a sales pitch to all of us lol:)  Steven got a new mini van and glasses.  Lou just turned the big 30, how wild.  Each and everyday I marvel at my parents and how they did it all.  I am so blessed.  I love this crazy day to day thing called life.

Garrett Gilbert Griswold

When I was in my last trimester and huge pregnant the doctor wanted to do an ultrasound to see how big the baby was.  I had gestational diabetes and Maggie being the little love she was wouldn't turn, (yes we tried manually (terrible experience)) so I had to have a C-Section with her.  I really wanted to try and have Garrett natural, drug induced and intoxicated if necciscary but at least vaginally as natural as that may be.  When they were doing the ultrasound they took an extra long time, Michelle was with me and a had Maggie thank heavens, she had taken her out of the room.  The nurse told me the doctor was going to come in and talk to me, I never really thought anything to much of it, my doctors had always been great at OU, but I was a little nervous.  The nurse handed me the paper work.  We had waited to find out what we were having, like waited 8 1/2 months, there was MALE printed right on the papers.  I was really nervous to have a boy, the only boy I had ever really been around growing up was Steven, I hadn't ever seen much male anatomy, everything boy petrified me.  Then the doctor came in and said they had found a spot on his kidney, from that moment on my heart was attatched to this "boy." I loved him, I knew I'd do anything in the world for him, I yearned for him, and I knew he had my heart.

About a week later at 1:03 in the morning I had the most beautiful little baby boy you have ever seen, he was amazing, the whole thing was amazing.  He has been such a gift from God.  He is the happiest, most cheerful little soul you have ever met.  He smiles at everyone and when he smiles he smiles with ever fiber of his being, it warms your heart!  He wakes up happy (my little sunshine sue sometimes not so much in the happiness area upon waking).  I fall a little more in love with him everyday.  Right now he has four little teeth, when he smiles it is so freaking cute, he kinda scrunches up his little face and his little eyes, I just want to keep him captured in my heart just as he is, he has been such a fun baby, I have loved being his Mamma.

We knew that we were going to have further testing on his little kidney, I think both John and I thought it would go away.  Well we continued to have tests and ultrasounds, catscans, and that little growth continued to fail to leave.  We were advised that it was going to be best to take it out.

The day we took you in was about as bittersweet as anything I have ever done.  Handing you over to the doctor was more than hard, it was almost unbearable.  We knew that the likelihood of something going wrong was slim but there was still a chance that we would never see our little baby again.  We stood in the room after they took you away and  held each other and cried, we said several prayers as a little family until you returned.  Since I have had babies I have came to the realization that you deal with Heavenly Father to watch over your family and you sweetheart.  You never realize how much your heart will be in love.

You have a pretty good scar little man. You had a drain in for a week and had to be in the hospital for about three days.  I slept in your crib with you, I was also very thankful to be able to go home.  We love you John Garrett Griswold and we are so glad you are ours!

Bathroom Visits

Potty training is complete, 100% like no accidents ever not even at night, bathroom ettiquite, well not so savvy.  Public restrooms, disgusting.  "Maggie please don't take your shoes off, you have to put your shoes on.  Don't, Maggie don't! the floor is dirty please get up, don't look under the bathroom stall.  Maggie the water has poo in it you don't want your bum in poo water.  Maggie please don't push the paper into the water it's dirty." You get the point.  It is like somehow bathroom toddler manners to touch everything in the bathroom with their feet, their tush, their hands, at times yes even their mouth, it GROSSES me out but we really do attempt to wash our hands very well before she once again touches every dirty surface imaginable!!  Oh how I love my little bathroom adorning child!!

She would still much rather wear diapers than panties, she informs me when her poo is coming and how many little pebbles have hit the water.  What a goose!  Today I realized the floor in front of my toilet is not wet from her playing in the toilet water but instead because she overshoots the toilet, yes I know isn't that just the cutest little fact ever:) oh the joys!

Damnit to hell

That may just be your next phrase. I'm sorry I used it at you today. It makes me cry to think about how easy it is for me to loose it. You are so fun and full if life, spit, and vinager. I don't ever want to dampen that spunk. You picked up handfuls if beans and let them go on the floor, knocked over your bowl if grapes I gave you, and hurried to get into the sugar bowl. You pulled down my curtain under the sink and then threatened to dump the trash can over ( you did that last week and we shared a few tears picking it up, we were on a healthy living kick for the week and it was gross.) I love you my little Maggie magoo, oh how I love you. I kissed you as many times as I could when I put you to bed, how did my little baby turn into a little girl? Garrett was given some clothes, you would love them to be yours:) you tell me you need your pants on so your legs don't get cold lol:) you currently hate pigtails and would prefer princess braids.  

Garrett-my little happy camper. Tooth number 4 is cutting through. I don't know how I ever dreamed I wouldn't love a boy, you have my whole heart. You smile with every fiber of your being and you just love everyone and everything. You are starting to stand in your own, you are so proud. We are doing the baby bird feeding right now lol, you love it!! You go in next week to have them operate on you. I am petrified. My world revolves around you and Maggie, I can't stand tge thought of anything happening to you or you having to hurt. I love you more than words can say:)

Do you Want to Talk to my Friends

Oh Maggie Magoo, you keep my life wild and crazy, you make me smile, laugh out loud and cuss on a regular basis.  Right now you carry around three cans of shaving cream, and a honey bear which all came to bed with us last night.  They are "my friends, do you want to talk to my friends?"  You take their tempature and last night you told dad that they where all about three months and couldn't eat avacodo's yet:)  You are very particular about what you where and you are the only completely potty trained girl I know that would much rather wear a diaper than panties, it is a bit of a pain when we are in public.  You knocked over the trash on purpose the other day, pretty sure just to see what I would do, and yes you cried big crocodile tears when we had to pick it up.  You LOVE your dad, and you are quite particular in him doing things for you, you poke him when you are out of a bottle to get up and get you one and you have to go with him, you love being his little side kick and he loves having you there.  You have everyone pegged as "he's nice" "he's mean" and it cracks your dad up.  You would just as soon be barefoot all day but love shoes and anything that is new to you.  Getting you to sit down and eat can be hard, you love ice cream and butter:)

Go fly a kite

We got Maggie a kite for Easter and she has begged to open it for days. Tonight we took it up to the barn. She was so proud holding on to it and kept calling Johnny come see:) I've thought so many times the last few days how glad I am that she has a daddy who loves her do much and that she loves back. We have had some bad nights with high fevers and many tears. John has gotten up with her and us so tender, one night he sat with her in theiving room and read her a book at three in the morning:) 

We went grocery shopping tonight, there was a whole basket of stuffed animals, she emptied about thirty of them onto a shelf so because "their sleeping."

Garrett is going to be crawling, it makes me sad rob think my baby is getting big do fast. I love being a mama. He smiles and coos and talks. He loved to blow spit bubbles and wakes up and goes to sleep doing it. He's holding himself up in plank, it's just a matter of time. He smiles at everyone that will look at him. I never dreamed I could love a cuddly chubby cheeked little one do much. He is so stinken cute!!

It is extremely dry here and at home. It is supposed to rain both there and here tommorow. I pray it's a soaker. They have grass bugs on dryland, dad is pretty sick. Em sold "my" truck, I loved that truck. Little Birdy my little Birdy is busy with wedding plans. Life is so short, I'm really trying to love every moment. 

Sharing the covers

Everyone said not to let you sleep with us but here I lay with you between me and Johnny g and Garrett laying on the other side, I feel complete when our little family us all tucked away into bed. My favorite moments happen just before we close our eyes. It's your story time, your giggle time, and just your tender little moments. You have strep throat, you has to get a shot. Poor little thing, as you say you had a bad day. We came home and took a nap then explored outside for baby kitties and made popcorn with lots of butter. 

John's grandpa died today. Him and Delores have been married 70 years, quite the accomplishment. 

Garrett you are my heart baby, oh how a love your chubby little hands and kisses. You wake up blowing bubbles and felling the world just how happy you are. I have enjoyed every minute of being your mama. You are rolling EVERYWHERE, you will soon be crawling. You've cut your first tooth and you are eating baby food though you don't always know what to think of it!  Maggie adores you, to much at times but you love her back. Of anything I've ever done being mamma is my favorite. I love johnny g and I love my babies.