late night rambles

It is late so this will be short because one thing I have learned is that I am a much nicer mom when I get enough sleep.  I need to be more diligent on sitting down and writing on here.  I realize more everyday just how fleeting these days are and how I need to spend a little more time marveling at the beauty of motherhood.  It is hard, there are some days that by the end of the day I am 150% done.  Then I look at those sweet little faces and I sit in awe of the fact that they are mine and God has entrusted me with their little spirits to teach and mold.  That is perhaps what I lose as much sleep over and fret over as much as anything is I want so badly to teach them all that they need to know for this big world.  There are so many pitfalls that they can avoid if they will just "Hold to the Rod."  The older I get the more I realize just how vital the gospel is in everyday living.  That the simple gospel truths lead to happiness.

My little Maggie, my true romantic.  You go around most days singing a little song, tonight before you closed your eyes we sang "Whenever I hear the song of a bird" twice and then you hummed it before you closed your eyes.  You dress up daily in my clothes and love all things pretty and lovely.  You want to were comfy pants to school and avoid wearing your boots because you aren't as fast when you run.  Your PE teacher told your dad the other day how beautiful you were, but they thing that made me the most proud is she told him that you are kind to everyone.  It made my heart so happy.  I pray you will always be kind, always be vivacious, a leader, a doer.  You are in charge.  We cut your hair short, today on the way to church you told me you wanted three wishes, 1-to be a fairy and a mermaid, 2- to have hair as long as Rapunzals, 3-I think was to be able to fly.  You got a ring pop for the first time in your life for your birthday and you thought it was wonderful.  I know it may be a mom fail that you have never had one but we have had more than a few teeth issues:)  Today you came home and made brownies, and they asked if we could please also make gingersnaps, you are my sweet tooth!  You built a fort in the middle of the kitchen floor and asked me more than a few times to please make you some curtains for your fort lol!  When we were in Fort Worth you wanted to just have a daddy and Maggie date, and also to sit in the benches down by the river.  You are smart, and extremely bull headed!  You refuse to eat school lunch, (I don't blame you).  I love you Maggie, more than words can say.  I know at times I am hard on you, I'm learning how to do this mom thing too, and sometimes I stink at it.  I bought balloons for your birthday.  You and Garrett have had a ball, I mean a big and mighty time filling them up with water.  The other night I was painting and came out of the mudroom to find water balloons popped on the carpet, in the bathroom and in the kitchen.  I wasn't happy.  Every towel in our house was wet.  I made you and Garrett help clean up.  I'm pretty sure you thought you had the worst punishment in the world.  We are working hard on trying to be kind to one another and say things nicely.  I promise this will be something you will be glad you have mastered in life.

Garrett, you are my true blue little cowboy.  You wake up and think about cows, you dream about them in your sleep, and your playtime consists of nothing but cattle.  Today you hooked up two trailers and spent a good hour hauling all your bulls to get their semen collected.  You are your dad's right hand man, you sort, help brand, mix up milk for the calves know as much about cattle as most grown men.  You walk around the barn yard like you own it.  You tell quite the yarns lately.  You love to tell stories about flying coyotes, all the cows you worked, and "when you were little."  You are the kindest hearted child I have ever met.  If I spank you, which you do get spanked more than the average child, you tell me I broke your little heart in two.  You are a fierce protector of Jack, but you also beat him up.  You LOVE, your toys and spend hours sorting, working, branding, and hauling them.  The feed store is your all time favorite place and that is the greatest reward that can be promised.  I'm pretty sure that we own everything that they carry in their inventory now.  You love your dad, more than any child I have ever seen you love your dad.  You go with him and cry if he leaves you.  The other day you burned your coat on the branding pot, I still have no idea how you didn't get burned.  You love Momentum, the South Pasture, and 108 and you talk about them all the time.  You will tell me it's 120 cold outside, and you gage everything on some type of scale like that.  You will tell me cow numbers and you truly believe in your mind that you know.  You love to wear your spurs and your cowboy hat, and you tell people all the time that you are a real cowboy.  You have NO FEAR of anyone and you know no strangers,  you go up and talk to everyone like they are your long lost friend including adults.

My little Jack Jack, how have you got so big, my little baby has turned into my busy climbing, cupboard emptying, garbage hoarding, vent filling child.  You are into EVERYTHING!  You climb on EVERYTHING!  You cry quite loud when I move the chairs so you can't get on top of the counter and you love to yell "Ma" at me.  You are my little side kick.  I have a dry spot on my side that had me quite worried.  I couldn't figure out why it was there and I knew I hadn't always had it.  I googled it several times and read a gazillion reasons as to why it may be there.  Then it dawned on my one day it's because I always carry you there.  You don't sit like a normal baby you balance on my hip with your knees or your feet lol you are a little character.  I love to watch you toddle around.  You love to go, try on everyone's shoes, ( you have put on Maggie's roller skates several times the last few days ), and you are getting to the point where you won't hardly settle down for a nap.  Garrett has a bad cough so John stayed home with him today while I went to church to teach my lesson and I left you home.  I faced time him when I got out of church and you looked at the phone and teared up and said MAMA, it about broke my heart.  I'm not quite ready for you not to be my baby.  I have loved being a mama and I'm not ready to have this little one part of my life done.  Right now if I am sitting in a chair you pull on my finger and make me move and then hurry as fast as you can to climb up to the table.  You insist on eating by yourself and you are actually pretty handy with a spoon and fork.  You take ahold of your Daddy's finger and pull him to where you want him to be.  You have got so you like to go and sit next to him on the couch and it tickles him pink, it is pretty darn cute.  I love your little dimple smiles and your happy giggles.  You are my sunshine, my worry wart, my little perfectionist.  You know who and what belongs to whom and where and it worries you when things like that aren't quite in order.

Johnny I love you, everyday I love you a little more than I did before, how time has flown.  You have blessed my life so much and I feel so complete with you by my side.  How did I find you.  We seldom sleep in the same bed and try to find little moments to spend together.  You carry so much weight on your shoulders and I worry about all loads that you bear.  You still are one of the kindest and most endearing men I know.  I like you just as much as I love you!

All the girls are home this weekend and I must admit I am a bit jealous.  They are working on our plum bum!  JD died, his funeral is tomorrow and they are all going to go.  What a great man who touched my life.  A dear friend, and true disciple of Christ and someone who taught me so much in how to treat others.  I will miss him, I really loved him and appreciated him so much throughout my life.

I am going to go off to dreamland now!

Sweet dreams,

Jeannie

Late Nights

Johnny G is up pulling a calf.  Right now 7 years ago I was waiting to hear that he had made it to Beaver, UT so that I could marry him.  What an awesome 7 years we have had.  They have been the fullest and happiest of my life.  I have LOVED married life.  There is craziness in all of it but as a whole having someone by your side who has your back day in and day out is the most amazing and comforting feeling you can have.  I love him more now than I did that day so long ago.

Our babies have defiantly added to the happiness of my heart.  How have they got big so fast, Mags just lost her first tooth, it made me cry.  I remember all so well when that little tooth first popped through just like it was yesterday.  She is such a little helper to me,

My little man is just that, he is no longer a little boy but is turning into my sweetheart.  He tells me "mom I love you," everyday.  He told me tonight he was going to marry me when he grows up and when he said his prayers he told Heavenly Father I love you so much!

We have had the flu here the last few days.  They have been so sick with high fevers and terrible coughs.  Garrett coughed so hard tonight he threw up on my lap and all over him.  The poor little guy.

I will be relieved when they are better.  Maggie had a fever last night of 103.4 under her arm, to high and to scary.

It has been crazy this holiday season but there has been a lot of fun to.  The kiddos loved Christmas and all it entailed.  There is a magic that comes with little ones.  They play so well together.  Little Jack Jack is in to EVERYTHING right now, EVERYTHING!  I am trying each day to just cherish there little hands, their smiles, their happy little light that shines because I know all to soon I will miss these days.  We are working like crazy to get everything done for Denver so sometimes there are way to many toons, the house gets way to dirty, and little hands and hearts get neglected.  I will be glad when I have all this done so I can just focus more on my littles.

Today I told Garrett he had to eat his pop tart in the Kitchen.  He brought it into his little someday maybe we will get it done play room and put it on a box and informed me that it was his own little kitchen and that he could eat in there.  Him and Maggie are a bit to smart for their own britches but pretty funny!

Dad came down for the sale and got the flu, he was to sick and it was to scary.  I love him so much, I hate the fact that he has to age and that time has started to catch up to him.  I make sure to call him everyday, to cherish the bits and pieces of time that is lotted to us all here on earth.  I don't know what I will do when he isn't there.  He has been such a support system and someone that I have depended upon so heavily.  I wish that I could be closer so that i could take care of him better.  One night here he was worried about some pain he had in his heart so I took him to the emergency room,  he was as sick as I have about ever seen him.

Tawnya finally had her little bambino, she hasn't even been able to go to the house because of how sick everyone has been.  Pretty much the whole family has been sick since Thanksgiving.  I can't wait to meet him!  Speaking of, we bought Rodney's mare Classy.  Garrett will say everyday that he is going to go and ride Rodney's favorite horse.

He and Maggie got a play horse for Christmas, they named it Sally and it is a mare, they both ride mares lol.  They played and played with it last night.

President Monson passed away last night.  What a sweet legacy he left of how to live our lives.  I thought of him crossing through the veil and seeing his sweetheart again.  What a happy reunion it must have been.

I am going to sign off of here.  I need to get on and write more often.  My babies days go by so fast and there are so many moments I would love to just bottle up!

Jack Jack says oopsie daisy, it is about as cute as anything in the world!

My messes mean I'm loved

I need to write in this more.  It just seems like all the little unimportant and important things take up my moments and my time.  I need to make time for this.  The little memories and laughter,  the first steps and the smiles.  Tonight I was feeling rather overwhelmed with everything and I stayed up a little later than usual and cleaned up the kitchen. One of Garrett's toy rosters fell into the sink, there was several pieces of onion skin on the floor from earlier when Jack decided to hit it and peel it and roll it, and have a joyful time with it.  There are spices scattered in various places throughout my kitchen on the floor of course because that is Jack's favorite drawer:)  I scraped off Maggie's plate of a large quantity of barbecue and mayo that she had created.  And instead of feeling overwhelmed I feel this wonderful sense of awe at the fact that all of those little messes are instead the real life proof that I have little people that love me and depend up on me.  All of our kiddos have been sick the last few days and poor little Jack has been super clingy and underfoot.  Sometimes I would do well to just slow down.  There was a quote from the General Relief Society that said, "Don't let your blessings become your burdens."  This is the day this is my life, my wonderful, beautiful, messy, crazy life.

My little Maggie Ann started kindergarten, can you believe it, kindergarten? Where did five years go, how do it go so fast.  She is so full of spunk, so full of life and everything it entails.  She tells me every night that I am her very favorite person in the world, my Maggie Magoo you are mine too:) I love you sweet girl.  I pray that I can teach her to be kind and have empathy.  She has a show pig up to the barn, her and Garrett LOVE LOVE LOVE to ride them.  She is so proud everyday when she comes home and shows me everything she has done.  Sending her to school was a big decision, I pray we made the right one.  I so badly want to teach her and mold her into being the woman she is destined to be, to help her know that she is a daughter of God.  Oh how I love her little soul.

Garrett broke his arm three weeks ago.  If there is anything he loves it is his dad, he idolizes John and everything he does.  They where riding in the pasture on a our fat, soft mares when Reba decided to buck, Reba is big, Garrett is small and the ground was hard.  John went off of Flossy trying to grab a hold of Garrett.  As soon as I saw him I knew his arm was broke.  I hate for him to go through anymore pain.  He really is such a good little fellow.  They had to put him under sedation to set it, it was broke and badly.  They wanted us to go out but the thought of leaving him alone and him being scared John bluntly told them no.  They had to manipulate it quite a bit to get it to go back.  We went in today and they cut off the hard cast and put it in a brace.  He will wear that for three weeks and then we will go back in for them to look at it.  He is a child that knows no strangers, he tells everyone "my name is Garrett Gilbert Griswold."  He will talk to anyone about anything and is quite the little fibber and story teller.  He has a fascination with guns at the moment, carries around a leatherman on his belt and dreams about more panels and chutes for his cows.  His favorite store in the world is the mill.

My Jack Jack, how did you turn one.  You have turned into such a little man, You are walking, you still love me unconditionally but the other day you held onto Maggie and wouldn't let her go.  You love your dad right now quite a bit to.  You hit Garrett with whatever you can find but would like to be doing whatever he is doing.  You giggle when and play and I miss you fast little speed crawling, you are getting so you hardly crawl at all and I went from having a baby to a toddler.  I wish that I could just pause time and make it all slow down and yet life and time marches on.

They are weaning at home right now, I would give anything to be there.  I miss home this time of year so much.  I love John, and he loves me, I'm really glad that we do because otherwise I don't know if I could stand not to be in Beaver, Utah.  I miss my family and my parents.  It bothers me not to closer to Dad, I worry about him so much.  What a pillar of a man that I am so blessed to call Father.  And my mom too, each day I am more grateful for the example of my parents and the way that they raised me.  I told Lori today I think I am a better wife because I have my sisters.  Three is quite overwhelming to me but I want Maggie to have a sister so bad, I don't know where I would be in my life without them,  they are my best friends.

My Johnny stays busy as always, how he does all he does I will never know.  He sent a load of calves to Poteau to French's today.  We also got a great rain, we needed it.  He called me and told me it was a $100,000 rain.  He stays so positive and is always thinking, I sometimes wish I could slow him down a bit but am ever grateful that he is mine.

I better head off to dreamland now.  I am a better mom with sleep and sick kiddos have left me lacking on it the last week.

Jeannie

One Year, how the time does fly

My little Jack Jack, how have you turned one year old already?  It seams like just yesterday you were my little tiny baby all wrapped up in a hospital blanket, so new, so full of wonder and awe and now you are my little chubby crawler who is ready to take the dishwasher and every open cupboard by storm.  I love you Jack, you are my little baby, I think that I have enjoyed you more just because I know how fleeting all these precious little moments are.  Tonight we sang happy birthday to you and when we said Jack, you knew that all the fuss comotion was about you!  You have four little teeth and your eye teeth are just getting ready to pop through.  You LOVE to be held and you are into everything.  You are  growing to love your daddy more everyday, you grin so easy for him and love to ride on the four wheeler.  You adore Maggie and she adores you, this morning she woke up and said, “How is our birthday boy?”  She packs you around all over and is such a proud little mamma of you.  Always stay close to your brother and sister.  The older I get the more I realize how precious these bonds are.  Of anything I can teach you and your siblings it is to love one another.  We have to get up early to take your brother to a dermatologist on his skin deals he has going on so this is going to be short.  Just know that you are my little sunshine, I have loved having you so much and I am so glad that you came to our family.  Chose the right always my little man, be strong and true just like your daddy and grandpa’s.  You will be walking any day. I just want to breath you in a little longer, keep you small for awhile.  Don’t blink, how the time does fly.  I love you forever!

Your momma

Oh how the time flies:) my little bambino is five months old. My love for him grows just a little more everyday. He is my smiling, happy, bubbly baby. I just want to keep him all wrapped up all the time in kisses and loves. I think often about the fact that he could be my last. I savor the moments, knowing that all too quick those chubby baby fingers will be slender little toddler hands. I have enjoyed my little jack. Maggie adores him. She loves to make him laugh, to hold him. She just flat out loves him.

We are all recovering from the stomach flu minus John and jack. John is getting it now and I'm praying jack doesn't. John stayed up all last night fretting about Maggie and I. He kept jack all night and I'm fairly sure he is running in zero sleep. Maggie was violently ill, she made me giggle more than once even for as si k as she was. She is hillarious. She was quite worried John would get sick and that Garrett would have to take care of us. She wants all the bad bugs out if her tummy. She loves the word freakin and used it multiple times.

John was a little short with her the other night. She told him it was okay because she knew he was under a lot of stress. The next night she told him she knew he wasn't getting much sleep. What a good. I'm going to try and get my little man to bed. He is wired tight

This morning I did Maggie's hair in pig tails. She looked in the mirror and said, looking pretty Maggie, looking pretty." She is so funny and so much fun. She was playing barbies tonight with one barbie and two toothbrushes. She has a vivid imagination. I love her so much. I would love to just freeze time. Garrett has gotten his baby chub back just a little. He is such a kind little fellow. He doesn't just love John, he idolizes him and wants to be with him always. We have one mean rooster right now that petrified the kids. They both scream loud when he comes around and if they are mean I threaten to put them out with him. It usually shapes them up pretty fast. Maggie prays at night that the coyotes will get him. He even has me a little voodooed. Tonight Maggie stood in the door and told John to shoot it dad, shoot it. Empathetic child:) Jack is growing like a weed. I forgot how little you got done with a new baby it also just how fun they where. He is a grunted and groaner. Prefers to be held. Looks nothing like my other two but oh how we love him!! Maggie is crazy about him. He is chubbing up and starting to make eye contact. How I love them. We sent heifers to Stillwater today from poteau, the craziness of fall has begun:( we leave tomorrow to go back to Stillwater, I wish not. I've had someone tipping my windows out, there hasn't been a good time to tell John. Pretty sure he's going to notice. So glad my babies live in the US. It is a scary world right now. I pray they will know peace. I e got my littles about to sleep. I better go catch the chickens and lock them up.

There is a corn on the cob sitting on the couch. My kiddos just went out the door to check pastures with John. Maggie was wearing a tutu and ballarina slippers. She changed into a striped shirt with leopard leggings and cowboy boots and Garrett is sporting cowboy boots and his underwear. They just came to knock on the window and show me the rainbow in the sky. I just changed jacks dirty diaper. The sun is shining